Own personal statement
My canvas was white. Another day in hell, everything that happened here was boring for me. I was only a 3rd grader. I mean, I had friends, but they were all within my class. All boys too. Girls had cooties, and I just never thought of interacting with other classmates. Studying was alright, but I never enjoyed it. I was seeking joy in this tiny, tedious school I went everyday. That’s when I knew, I will be the Satan in this hell.
My canvas was grey. It started off incredible. I’d pick on kids that I disliked and punch them with words. I’d aim and throw balls at those little scrubs’ faces. I’d isolate them out of the gang I had and laugh at how miserable they were. My inner demon smiled and laughed as the losers cried. I knew I was on top of the food chain, even the teachers couldn’t control me. I would get stopped by those gatekeepers every day, lecturing me how everyone should be nice to and respect each other, but they were only words to me. The inner demon slowly took over, and I was becoming a cold-blooded monster.
My canvas was black. As I grew older and older, the things I did became worse. I was satisfying the demon inside me. I started picking on people that I didn’t even know. I simply judged a book by its cover. At this point, I didn’t know if my friends followed me because they liked who I was, or simply because they were scared of me and didn’t want to end up on the bad side of me. I started to feel uneasy about my surroundings. Am I the person who I wanted to be? Should I be doing this? The human Isshin kept asking all these questions to the demon. I started contemplating about the true colors of myself.
My canvas was colorless. With the demon craving for more sorrow, time passed and I was in middle school. With uncertainty about myself, I showed up to the first day of school as a middle schooler. As I took my first steps into the new environment, I was in shock. I was surrounded by tall, buff, scary people. These were the people I was going to be dealing with from now on, I thought to myself. I remember a senior that came up to me that day, looked down on me, glared at me, and walked away without a word. At that moment I figured out that I am in a completely new world than before. Bullying kids and being on top of the food chain was the world I used to live in. But the tables have turned. Now I was looked down by everyone here, and I fell to the bottom of the food chain. I was terrified. I was overwhelmed.
All these emotions made me realize, how powerless and weak I was. This big slap in the face changed my view of society and how I should really act. My inner demon vanished. There was a big smile on my face that day. I saw some of the kids I used to make fun of. I went up to them and apologized. I saw some kids I’ve never seen before. I went up to them and introduced myself. Peace. Kindness. Respect. That one death stare from that random senior changed my whole perspective towards people. That’s when I knew, I will be the angel in this heaven. My canvas was white again.
My canvas was grey. It started off incredible. I’d pick on kids that I disliked and punch them with words. I’d aim and throw balls at those little scrubs’ faces. I’d isolate them out of the gang I had and laugh at how miserable they were. My inner demon smiled and laughed as the losers cried. I knew I was on top of the food chain, even the teachers couldn’t control me. I would get stopped by those gatekeepers every day, lecturing me how everyone should be nice to and respect each other, but they were only words to me. The inner demon slowly took over, and I was becoming a cold-blooded monster.
My canvas was black. As I grew older and older, the things I did became worse. I was satisfying the demon inside me. I started picking on people that I didn’t even know. I simply judged a book by its cover. At this point, I didn’t know if my friends followed me because they liked who I was, or simply because they were scared of me and didn’t want to end up on the bad side of me. I started to feel uneasy about my surroundings. Am I the person who I wanted to be? Should I be doing this? The human Isshin kept asking all these questions to the demon. I started contemplating about the true colors of myself.
My canvas was colorless. With the demon craving for more sorrow, time passed and I was in middle school. With uncertainty about myself, I showed up to the first day of school as a middle schooler. As I took my first steps into the new environment, I was in shock. I was surrounded by tall, buff, scary people. These were the people I was going to be dealing with from now on, I thought to myself. I remember a senior that came up to me that day, looked down on me, glared at me, and walked away without a word. At that moment I figured out that I am in a completely new world than before. Bullying kids and being on top of the food chain was the world I used to live in. But the tables have turned. Now I was looked down by everyone here, and I fell to the bottom of the food chain. I was terrified. I was overwhelmed.
All these emotions made me realize, how powerless and weak I was. This big slap in the face changed my view of society and how I should really act. My inner demon vanished. There was a big smile on my face that day. I saw some of the kids I used to make fun of. I went up to them and apologized. I saw some kids I’ve never seen before. I went up to them and introduced myself. Peace. Kindness. Respect. That one death stare from that random senior changed my whole perspective towards people. That’s when I knew, I will be the angel in this heaven. My canvas was white again.